If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
