you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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