i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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