Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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