You're so nebulous sometimes
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize
