party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
