I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize
