im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
