oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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