If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize