Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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