does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
birth control should be required to get into college
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
