i don't plan on having that self control this summer
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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