My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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