READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
