just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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