all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
