I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
