Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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