I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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