AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
