Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
