I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
