I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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