pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
