You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
