why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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