I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
