She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
