After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
