And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
