What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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