just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Randomize
