Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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