question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Houston, we have a squirter
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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