That's intense
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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