You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
