where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
