...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
