she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
