we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
