OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
