never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
