he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
