Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
