I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
