i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
