My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize