i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
