Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
