I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
